An Eventful Summer
by potterride
Summary: The mysterious wonders of Earth leave the Weasley family frowning as they look upon the new human/Muggle object that is in their Burrow. What will happen? Especially with Fred and George, and their pranking abilities? PARODY
1. Chapter 1

** ***Disclaimer**** I do not own vending machines or Harry Potter...not me ...**

Chapter The Battle Begins

"Okay, Weasleys, gather 'round. I have something exciting to show." Mr Weasley grinned with excitement.

"Dad, is it another flying car?" Fred asked, he wasn't kidding. Mrs. Weasley nearly jumped out of her skin.

"Arthur, if it is another one of those _flying cars_, I will personally make sure that..." Mrs. Weasley started to yell.

"Mum, calm down, Hermione's here, and Harry are here. And unlike us, they are _normal_." Ron said putting a hand on Hermione's shoulder. Fred and George smirked at Ron, and then immediately took it off. Hermione blushed a little, but didn't say anything.

Mrs. Weasley sighed, still not very pleased with her husband.

"Do you have the ability to make apples come out of your nose?" George asked, again, he was asking a serious question.

The whole family just looked him like he had apples coming out of_ his_ nose. Ron murmured something that was probably like "I knew I should have left with Charlie to Romania."

"_Wicked!"_ Fred smiled with joy as he did a wand-shake with his brother.

"No, George, that's not what I was going to show you. Please stop guessing, you are putting you mum and I to shame." Arthur buried his face in his hands.

"Well, then, what is it then?" Fred snapped like they asked the most rational guesses.

"It's a Muggle vending machine!" Arthur said with pride. The whole family just looked at him, except for Harry and Hermione; they were looking around for the vending machine.

"A _vending machine_? What is that rubbish?" Mrs. Weasley looked at her husband, who was still grinning.

"And where is it?" Hermione asked.

Arthur looked around, like he was looking for the machine too.

"You mean it's not here?" Arthur did a 360 sweep, as if the vending machine was behind him.

"Maybe I left it at work?" Mr. Weasley mumbled to himself.

"Uhhh, Mr. Weasley, is that it at the front door?" Harry pointed out.

Ah, yes, Harry. Weasleys..er and Hermione and Harry, follow me!" said Mr. Weasley with a wave of his hand, he guided them to the front door.

They studied the vending machine very carefully. It looked like a big black box with food in it. The clear glass surrounded the food inside of the machine. Inside, there were snack foods, which were bound by a swirled clip. There was a latch to open the glass on the side of the machine.

"I am guessing this rubbish, is the all famous vending machine you were talking about?" Mrs. Weasley glared at her husband.

"Molly, it is not rubbish. You don't have to cook often, and we can cut down on magic." Mr. Weasley's confidence seemed to fading- very quickly.

"IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT? TO CUT DOWN ON MAGIC?" Mrs. Weasley yelled, probably loud enough for Charlie to hear in Romania.

"Well, it would give us the chance to," Mr. Weasley said, avoiding his wife's dagger eyes.

"If it helps, I think it's pretty cool...er, brilliant, really." Ron said in a tiny voice. He looked up to his mum's eyes, which were now glaring at him. His dad regained some color to his face, and mouthed Ron a 'thank you.'

"Molly, dear, maybe we should continue this conversation after the kids go to bed." Mr. Weasley said, steering his wife away from the vending machine.  
"Be careful, with the machine, kids! Put in some Muggle money and it will drop food into the box on the bottom of the glass door." Mr. Weasley shouted over his shoulder, they all exchanged looks, like daring one another to touch it.

"Well, we are living here, we may as well get used to it." George said, walking towards it.

"Uhhh, anybody got any Muggle money on them?" George searched his pockets as if he had some money. Then, he redirected his eyes towards Hemione, who angrily put her hands in her pockets. She tossed a nickel to George, who examined it for a minute, like it would blow up in his face.

He started to put in the coin to the slot above this dial pad with letters and numbers on it.

"Uhhh, it took my money," George said, looking lost yet angry at the machine. Hermione did a mental facepalm, groaned -she would have done an actually facepalm to George's face. -

"Just type in the letter and number that corresponds to the letter and number on the snack you want." Hermione said tersely. She seemed uncomfortable knowing all this, and they don't. It seems like the most obvious thing to her.

George saw her anger and just closed his mouth. He did what Hermione told him to, and gasped at the outcome - actually everybody did except for Harry and Hermione.

"It came out like-like magic..." Fred stared at the machine like it was the Marauders.

"Oh, Fred, it no magi,-" Hermione stopped herself and smile, "it's totally magic, you never know what it might do. I heard that people die more from falling vending machines than sharks."

Ron and the twins jumped back and, Hermione smirked at them.

"Scared?" she taunted.

"We Weasleys are never scared!" Fred said flashing a bright smile. Hermione gave a short, hollow laugh and walked off. Trust the twins and Ron that was more taunting than any of her retorts. Now if this couldn't be any more predictable, Fred and George get an idea run off to their room..yada yada yada..leaving Ron and Harry there talking about stuff that no one cares about. Blah, Blah, Blah. Let's just skip the rest of the day and go to the next morning. Day two of the mysterious _vending machine_...spooked?

**A/N: in all fair and honesty..I have no idea why I am putting this up..I just love to have people laugh ok? Or at least smile...and if you are going to send some hurtful and negative reviews back, give it to me in criticism form..because there is another chapter coming. So...if you have nothing nice to say and cannot even say it in a sorta gentle way..DON'T REVIEW! It's not that hard. So if you laughed smiled or chuckled or even buried your face in your hands.. REVIEW! I need new and serious inspiration.. don't I? Anyhoo (darn it has a read line under, it's not a word! My BFF won that fight) Laugh and smile today!**

**good luck with life :)**


	2. Chapter 2 Day Two

_Day Two...DUN DUN DUNNNN_

"Waking up in the morning feelin' like a wizard...having a twin by your side makes all the difference in the world!" (make that into a tune..). This was Fred and George's alarm clock ringer. Yea, they thought the exact same thing you're thinking.

"_An alarm clock? They are wizards? Don't they have magic? I mean that's really low!"_ now here's Fred and George's reply- "_We have no idea either, Hermione gave it to us for our birthdays. We would have used for a prank by now, but they ringer is AWESOME! So shut up about and live on with your lives."_

Fred got out of his bed, and threw a pillow at George's bed.

"Wake up, was the vending machine a dream?" Fred asked, rubbing his eyes.

"I don't know, all I know is that it stole money, so I hope it was a dream." George sat up, and looked at his brother.

"Well, let's go find out." Fred ran downstairs, only to hear..nothing.

"Mum? Are you down there making toast?" George called as he came behind Fred.

Silence. The only noise was the faint humming that was coming from the vending machine.

"So it wasn't a dream," Fred said as he crept down the stairs. They looked at the snacks for the first time. All it had was pretzels, chips, cookies, gummy worms, and bottles of tomato sauce. It didn't seem like a lot, just enough. The tomato sauce was puzzling to have in a vending machine.

"You hungry?" George asked Fred.

"No, I just have a brilliant idea," Fred smiled evilly. "You thinking what I'm thinking?" a smile spread across George's lips. They both had an idea, it was so much better than the one they had last night. Which in case your wondering, they were thinking how to get the ability to have apples come out of their noses.

Anyways, they went upstairs, went to their room, locked the door- laughing evilly to themselves.

Ron, Harry, and Hermione were still in there rooms, and Ron was having a nightmare. It was about Fred and George stuffing him into the vending machine- not getting out.

"AHHHHHH!" Ron yelled, sitting upright.

"Ron..." Harry groaned. "Why are you yelling?" In the room next door, Ron could hear the girls snickering, and he turned bright red.

"Sorry, bad dream," Ron mumbled to the back-to-sleeping-didn't-hear-a-word-Ron-said Harry.

The door crept open, and in came Hermione! Yayyy now time for a Ron+Hermione moment! Please stay tuned for this part of the story.

"You were screaming," Hermione whispered. "Did you have a bad dream, or something?

"Heh, no. I'm brave enough not to scream and know that it was only a dream." Ron said, turning bright red again.

"Are you sure? I mean not the bravery part. I know you're brave. But, um, what was the nightmare about? I'm here for you, Ron." Hermione came and sat next to him.

"Uh, uh, well..." Ron was uncomfortable talking to a person about this. Hermione would probably laugh..then again...

"You don't have to tell me. Good night, Ron." Hermione gave him a quick hug, that more like her body touched his body by accident hug, and then left.

"G'night, Hermione." Ron said sleepily. He drifted off to a far away dusk land, knowing Hermione was there for him. Since, it was morning at that time too, the sunlight seeped through the curtains letting sunlight spill everywhere.

"Stupid sun," Harry said under his breath.

"I highly doubt Mum made breakfast, since she is still mad at Dad. She doesn't make breakfast when she is mad." Ron explained to Harry as they were going down the stairs.

"Well at least we have the vending machine," Harry said.

"Yea I know! It's bloody brilliant, mum's cooking was never the best." Ron whispered the last part. They stopped in front of the vending machine, taking a look at what it had to offer.

"Why tomato sauce?" Ron asked.

"So, we can make pasta?" Harry took a wild guess.

"Good morning, guys." Hermione said coming down the stairs. Ron took one look at her, and blushed, Hermione caught his eye and blushed also.

"Mornin'!" Fred said coming up behind Ron. "How was your morning, this _early _morning?" Ron knew exactly what he was talking about, and just shrugged.

"Anyways, whose in the mood for some tomato sauce?" George asked coming up behind Fred.

"Yea, what is with the tomato sauce?" Ron asked. They all just shrugged,

"The vending machine is a little weird. I mean it doesn't seem right." Hermione crossed her arms over he chest.

"Nah, Hermione, the vending machine is fine. It's not going to do to anything to us." Ron smiled sheepishly. He was almost unsure of himself.

"Just remember, vending machines have caused more death than sharks." Hermione waved a finger at them.

"Stop with the miscellaneous facts, and let's eat some tomato sauce!" Fred cheered.

"You do know that you probably just said the longest word of _your_ vocab? Also, that tomato sauce has more salt than a package of bacon?" Hermione asked. Her eyes were saying, "I'm right, so nobody argue with me." Of course no one dared to.

"So, you don't trust this vending machine because of all the sodium it has more than a package of bacon?" George asked breaking the silence.

Hermione just looked at him, and not being able to come up with a good retort, she just walked off. Leaving the boys with the un-trusting vending machine.

**IMPORTANT A/N: Hello people, the facts that I am giving you about the vending machines and the sodium content is true! I have my ways..MWHAHAHA... anyways..hoped you enjoyed this one..I personally love the you don't that is fine..I understand..i think? anyways hope ya'll enjoy the weekend and some well deserved rest...smile and laugh :)**

**good luck with life :)**


	3. Chapter 3 Day Three

_Day Three_

Ron came down the stairs to only find Fred and George. Hermione was talking to Ginny about something as she put, "None of your earswax." He decided just to ignore it, and go look for Harry. He was actually going to Diagon Ally for some business. He was only 14 and he had _business_ to do. So, it was only Ron and the twins. Plus, his parents have been in their room the whole three days since the vending machine has been here, arguing.

"So, what are you two doing?" Ron asked Fred and George. They were playing with the latch on the side that was supposed to open the glass door.

"Trying to figure out how to open this," Fred answered keeping his focus on the latch.

"It can't be that _hard_," Ron said coming over to help them.

"Oh, yeah? You try doing it then, genius." George stepped away from the door to give Ron his space.

"Okay, fine." Rom started to fiddle with it, but it just looked like a black rectangle that neither of them could open. There was no lock and key, and no button. Finally, of what seemed like hours of Fred and George making stupid sounds and snickers, Ron got it open.

"Ah, I got it. In your faces!" the glass door swung open, with a loud creak. All he did was lift the post the placed right on top of the black box, in the slit.

Before Ron could admire/brag about his accomplishment any more, the twins pushed Ron in the vending machine and latched to door again.

"OOMPH!" Ron grunted as he stumbled in.

"Fred and George get me out of this thing!" Ron said, his words muffled. It sounded like, "Frid and Gorge get 'e ut of this 'ing!" His body was pressed against the glass, barely any room for him to move.

"Sorry no can do, Ron. You see we can never open things, just close them." Fred grinned.

"Just do _Alohamora_," Ron said in his muffled voice.

"About that," George chuckled. "We aren't really good with spells." Ron glared at them.

Moving on. I'm hungry, are you hungry, George?" Fred asked.

"For some tomato sauce," George grinned evilly.

"You wouldn't!" Ron yelled. His eyes widened as Fred started to put in the numbers for the tomato sauce and George tossed him fifty cents that he stole from Hermione. The tomato sauce was right above Ron's head, if it opened...

The tomato sauce started to move forward, dropping down- the top first.

_Don't let the lid fall off,_ Ron prayed.

A couple of inches from Ron's head the lid snapped off, most likely because it was loose. The red sauce started to pour out, it started to flow out so smoothly. Red chunks landed on top of Ron's already-red-enough-head. The sauce covered his shoulders, and dripped down his body. Ron could barely see out of eyes. The last thing he could see before the sauce blurred out his vision, was the unkempt hair of Hermione Granger.

**IMPORTANT:**

**A/N:YO, how are you everybody? Sorry for the shortness...is it short? In my opinion it is...i guess? And sorry that i have not updated this story in sooooooo long...the only reason why I did no post the story..was because of the stupid error. Just replace the URL word 'property' to 'content' ok? Awesome! and review plz! READ THIS PART: btw go to sweet-potter xx and check out the story! IT'S HILARIOUS! go right now...scratch reviewing and go check out sweet-potter xx the story is really good and will make you laugh! PLEASE GO CHECK IT OUT! laugh and smile ;)**

**good luck with life :)**


	4. Chapter 4

Day Three-Night

"That was the most _stupidest_prank I have ever seen!" Hermione yelled at Fred and George! "No one is that thick to actually get a bottle of tomato sauce from a vending machine, so it could pour out on some one's head!"

"She has to admit it was a pretty well-thought out plan," George whispered in Fred's ear.

"That's not the point!" Hermione snapped.

"So you are admitting that it was a good plan?" Fred smirked. Hermione's face turned bright red.

"What was the plan anyways?" Ron piped up from the corner of the room. He was sitting pretzel style, combing out the rest of the tomato chunks from his hair. He took a shower with some fruity lavender stuff that Hermione made him use. The bath tub was filled with the color red.

"Before you came down, we opened the vending machine, and made the cap on the tomato sauce loose. Then, we closed the glass door when we heard your footsteps. Since we are amazing actors-" Fred grinned.

"We pretended we didn't know how to open the vending machine glass door." George said, taking over the explanation. "We pushed you in after you opened it, locked it back up, put the Muggle money we stole from Hermione-" Hermione was now glaring at them, sending daggers through their bodies. Hermione only wishing that wasn't said metaphorically. "Anyways, we put the coin into the slot, the tomato sauce came down," George looked at Ron. "And the rest is history."

"You just hope that neither your mum nor your dad finds-" Hermione stared to say.

"WHY IS THERE TOMATO SAUCE ON THE GLASS OF THE VENDING MACHINE?" Arthur shrieked. "WHO PUT BROKEN GLASS INSIDE THE VENDING MACHINE?" they were pretty sure Charlie would call from Romania any minute asking why there was shouting.

"Fred, George, come down here!" Molly yelled, calmer than her husband.

"Of course they always assume it was us," Fred mumbled, he hung his and walked out with George. Ron and Hermione stared at each other, as if they were having a mental conversation.

"I am, um, sorry for not getting you out sooner of the vending machine," Hermione looked at the ground.

"It okay," Ron mumbled. They could say nothing more, because more shouts came from downstairs. Arthur and Molly were furious.

"If you cannot handle this vending machine we are getting rid of it!" Molly yelled. She was trying to be mean and tough about it, but anyone could tell that she was happy. "I mean you just don't do a prank involving a vending machine and your brother." she continued. Fred and George stood there looking guilty, and their eyes fixed on the floor. However, they had grins plastered to their faces.

The next day, they vending machine was being brought back to the Ministry of Magic where it could probably put be put to better use. That was the Minister's words, which really meant, "I'll discard it as soon as possible,"

Fred and George stayed in bed all morning, not caring to say good-bye to it. Hermione just stood taking in one final look at it, and walked away. Ron mumbled curse words under his breath to it. Calling it some ugly names that no one would call a vending machine. Molly and Arthur had opposite emotions.

However, everyone learned something throughout this whole experience, vending machines cause more deaths than sharks.

**A/N: Yo, this is not my favorite chappie, and I'm soooo sorry for taking forever! Between the prank story on sweet-potter xx (go check it out) and other stories. I haven't had time…whoops…heh well this was the final chappie I hope you guys had a lot of fun and laughs reading this, I did. **** smile and laugh today :)**

**Good luck with life :)**


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